Positivist Habit Addition: Rationalizing Addiction
Since you are not going anywhere and things are not going very well, why not?
could try stitching together the vituperative convocation, thoughts chewing each others’ throats, blood clotting on fangs and gristle in thick reddish-black drippings – simultaneously sinuous and gritty mucosal grift, lifeblood cashed out -
Everything falls apart, sooner or later.
something familiar to the notion of failure in these thoughts rattling like pocket change…
Check what you expectorate. It gets worse.
I may be a puppet, feel like I am being pulled along on a string, by strings, at times like there is a hand in my gut, torque applied at any hint of resistance…
Check for worms. It gets worse.
why do the most horrible things get names you would never suspect? glossolalia, scatology, ascaris lumbricoides, hemorrhage, love, aqua vitae…
They are all infectious and sinister until glossed over with euphemisms.
one more bottle is all it will take, things can get better, I only need one more… dose, drink, fix, whatever.
But who is keeping count?
